kenape?

kenape org suke carik kesalahan org lain semata-mata nk deny tindakan sendiri?
kenapa msti berlumba2 wt bnda salah.. klu bende baik xde lak nk ikut..
xbaik tuding jari kat org lain... satu jari u tuding kat org, lg 4 tu mgarah ke mane lak?

kwn,
saya bercakap bukan hanya sekadar seorang sahabat.. tp juga sebagai saudara seIslam dan atas sebab saya hamba Allah.. bukan niat utk mencari kesalahan dirimu, tp juga utk mengingatkn diri sendiri..

hey u klu ade yg menegur tu pasti ade sbb die tegur..
muhasabah diri balik... tanye diri sendri ape yg kita da wat spjg tempoh ini sehingga ade yg tidak puas hati..
bukanlah maksud u need to be perfect in other ppl's eyes.. but juz enuf to be alert with the surroundings..

dan selemah2 iman adalah apb melihat kemungkaran, dia membencinya dgn hati
tp klu kemungkaran itu kita sendiri yg buat..... dmana iman kita pd waktu itu?

klu rasa dah semakin jauh dariNya, maka kembalilah
kasih sayang Allah itu melebihi kemurkaanNya

jgn berhenti mgharap keampunanNya

i love u as a fren, but i dont like ur style..

"Dan jika syaitan datang menggodamu, maka berlindunglah kpd Allah. Sungguh Dia Maha Mendengar dan Maha Mengetahui" 

[7:200]

prince charmed!

alhamdulillah, the long mashghulah week has come to the end...

• assignment....checked!
• radio xm.......checked!
• arabic class...not check yet coz there's still 3classes to go..

well it's okay.. at least wut i concerned now is the week has finished! yes~! finally i can rest a bit.. so ape lg.. jom sambung tgk cole!

"sape cole??" 

lalala~

okay3....allow me to introduce u 2 diz guy...
have u ever heard of a tv series "charmed" before?
xpenah?! u're sure? nvm, i'll gv u a hint.. myb u'd heard of it b4 but can't remember coz da story was aired long2 time ago so u forgot.. huhu..

does it ring a bell?? hope so ^^

haa! lets jump to main point.. diz guy (pic below)... die ni lah cole...

Julian McMahon a.k.a Cole Turner

ensem x? macho x? haha

diz guy i admired him since long.. since the first time i watched the series.. (skola rendah kot tym tu)... n yet still admiring him.. as cole la wut i mean..

noe y? coz he, cole (the character) was cool~! macho lak tu.. haha... oke sye da gile.. (ignore me)

tonite, i have a date with him... but rite now im going out for a date with my gelfren.. hehe..

p/s: jap ea yang.. nk solat asar jap.. meet u at the midway k.. c ya!^^

tension~!~!~!

bole tak pas abes blaja nnt nk dok uma goyang2 kaki je.. 

mak~~~ hanis nk balik ='(

*mode analyzer : bad mood! ++homesick 

kalah sleeping beauty

oke yesterday night i slept like CRAZEE! hahah.. berjam-jam kott! mmg xigt dunia lahh..

if u say it's bcoz u slept late the other nite, so not true.. awal kott! not even 11 yet u started terhangguk2 and immediately dashed into bed.. only after those seven loong hours of sleeping u woke up the next morning at 5++.. so for sure it's not the reason.. huhu

mmm myb bcoz i'd been awake for the whole day... can i make that as a reason...? min saah khamsah assubh lahad saah tis'ah billail.. [5am-9pm] hey, isnt dat's ur daily routine? u even awake longer than that.. so, no no nosss... that's surely not ur main reason..

haha.. but dun forgett.. u've been melalak the WHOLE DAY yesterday.. woke up at five, went to class at eight (da la pegi lambat, klas kul8 kul 8 kua rumah.. sO0o wit ur azam baru.. kah3).. but alhamdulillah everything went smoothly.. i bravely rode the tramco alone to class yesterday morning.. (if i considered taking the tram, myb at 8.30 baru sampai.. ngee).. double thankful coz this one ammu helped me to cross the morning chaotic traffic.. and triple thankful that the class hadnt started yet.. alhamdulillah =)

first day of class..... NICE! class at eight, but started at 8.30.. 2hours of lecture on anaesthesia (suppose) but as it ended at 9.30 so an hour lecture only.. from the start of the class i kept on wondering why on earth that i remembered seeing this lecturer before..? imagine.. only after about half of the lecture had passed i suddenly said, "oo! this prof yg aja cpr tuu.. no wonder mcm penah nmpk" and my fren went like "aah mmg la" cehh, lmbt pickup tol.. >,<

at ten, we had a practical in the hospital.. as usual the doc came late.. cant blame them tho.. u shud know dat all these docs are bz... after waited for quite some time, finally the doctor came.. it's the first time to enter the OT/OR .. kat cni la i mean.. and we had to stand the whole hour! (adeh..sakit pinggang..) know why? bcoz there's no chairs in the OT (of coz) and the very main reason is bcoz we are learning with a surgeon (anaesthetist).. they are used to stand for hours during surgery.. no wonder they dont seem to feel tired of standing... hmm..

after class, i went to carefour along with my two other friends.. we had lunch there... after lunch we wanted to withdraw some money for shopping.. guess wut.. the atm was temporarily out of service!! arghh... mmg xde rezeki nk shopping gila2... patut pon kot.. klu x, tak igt dunia lak nnt.. huhu.. so it's ok, we juz went to carefour to buy some stuff, then went for window shopping for a while (a while ke? haha).. and bought drinks that worth 30genih per cup.. bajet ade fulus pule padahal mafish fulus khalis! nex time before buying a cup of coffee dun forget to ask for the price.. haha

the drinks.. LE30/cup.. not worth it!

at 4 we headed back home.. and i was supposed to have a study group after asar at my house but bcoz i hanged out for too long and came back late, so the study group was cancelled.. felt guilty to my dear fren who waited for so long sampai tetido2 la.. hehe, sory dear.. gomenn2~

that nite, after maghrib my fren and i went to class tafakuh but unfortunately i was so tired and sleepy that i missed quite alot of  info.. sory ustaz akli for sleeping in ur class.. it's not bcoz ur class was boring but it's bcoz i was so tired.. gomenn.. tp tdo dlm mjlis ilmu dpt pahala kn.. ngee

last night's topic was about halal & haram dlm perkahwinan dan ape ntah.. i didnt paid attention coz i was bz sleeping.. haha.. but for sure i heard the ustaz said Islam melarang tidak berkahwin.. (haaa, ape lg kwn2.. jom kawin... tet~!) hehe

the class ended at 8++ and we went home straight after the class and reached home at about 8.40.. afterwards i immediately went to bed.. and woke up at 3 in the morning for my isya' prayer... alhamdulillah, syukur.. at least i got the chance to do qiam last nite.. da byk ari xwat sb asek bgn lewat da subuh pon.. then when to sleep again at 4 till 5.30.. bajet nk bace buku, siap da bwk atlas anat naik katil tp letak kat tepi amik beary peluk n sambung tdo.. haha.. after subuh, my fren messaged me, asking if i wanted to join her cycling in ma'moura.. i replied her massage saying that i juz woke up and myb will be late if i wanted to join.. n so juz say no thanks.. then continued sleeping until 8.. hahah... tido lg lg n lg!! 

this morning, i woke up feeling soo happy to be sleeping that loong hours.. haha..

but still too lazy to get out of bed.. senjukk! guess winter really makes ppl hibernate a lot! hik3

ok guyss, how many hours do u think i slept last nite? alot rite! 

=the happy sleeping beauty=

internal medicine in memory

fuuuhhhhhh~~~~ ALHAMDULILLAH! at last... i can finally say.. "osce is overr!! relex n enjoy!!" huhu.. but not for long.. surgery is expecting my arrival to open a new chapter in the book of medicine.. hence, making all those moments in the internal medicine as an unforgettable memories.. surely im gonna miss all those funs.. but yet hoping not to lose even a single knowledge gained!

and here comes the story behind the 'fun playful' osce:

first spot with Dr Perihan :: taking pulse
my comment: regular, 80 beats per minute, normal force & volume, no special character, unequal with slightly weak pulse on the left side, and the vessel wall is not felt. dorsalis pedis & posterior tibial are both felt. (and she went.. gud, gud) *happy2*
second task i was asked to palpate the carotid artery... ops2!! i've done it wrongly.. my hand was like dancing all over the patient's neck searching for the artery but failed! =.=" (thank god the doctor was kind to give me chance).
and the best part.. she gave me full marks! she even showed me my marks.. huhu thank u doctor for the full marks.. luv.u.doc! <3

second spot :: inspect the lower limb
the first thing i comment, there's LL edema. and the doctor goes, "okay. but u hv to inspect"
silly me, how do u know it's LL edema juz by inspection.. u shud palpate for that.. huhu
and here's another story.. after i'd finished commenting on my findings and while the doctor was busy giving marks, i noticed the patient was giving a non verbal signs telling me bout his amputated right leg.. the most important finding i shud comment on but didnt.. hahah! thank u my patient for ur help.. hope it'll improve my marks a bit ;)

third spot :: examine the thyroid
the first worse spot ever! first question from the doctor.. what is the item of examination? i answered, "inspection, palpation and auscultation." and then i started to examine the patient.. while giving the comment, the doctor asked, "how do u know it's the thyroid?" ... i answered, "by asking the patient to iblag (swallow)" ... and then the doctor asked sumtin (i can't remember wut) which made me went blurr *ting tong* and then he said, "u forget to mention about percussion" (gud hint there) but still im in blurness~~ only after the xm i noticed that he was asking me to percuss the upper part of the sternum to see if there's enlargement of the gland extending to the mediastinum.. argh~!! hate it! hate it! hate it!

fourth spot :: auscultate the mitral area
my comment: muffled S1, pansystolic murmur, radiating to the axilla. "what is ur possible diagnosis?" .. i answered, "mitral regurge" ...(doctor nod2)...  "what are the causes of systolic murmur?" actually, i didn't really get the question.. and so i juz stand there blankly staring at the doctor without answering.. i shud hv asked him to repeat the question!! and now im regreting for not answering it.. u knew, but u lost the chance to answer..huh!

fifth spot :: inspect the back
not much of a story to tell.. it went smoothly, but still worrying about the marks... nice doctor, giving points to comment on, but bad me for not mentioning all of them =(

sixth spot :: acromegalic patient, inspect the face, hand and feet
the first comment i gave, slight slanting of the forehead.. suddenly the doctor asked, "why all of u gave the same comment? there's no such a thing of slanting of the forehead.. from which medical book did u get this term?" errkkk! "i dunno doctor, but this is the knowledge we got during our preclinical year." "wut?" "yes, the doctor from our preclinical studies told us this" and the doctor when.. "hmm..." ....but actually it's true, the doctors of internal medicine never once told us this point.. it's juz us making use of previous knowledge clinically.. huhu... but still im confused~! why taught us points that not even exist?! 0_o

seventh spot :: papate the spleen
nice spot... with very direct question.. and altho my comment was not 100% completed but still the doctor gave me full marks!! yeay! alhamdulillah, thank u Dr amani~ :)

eighth spot :: inspect the abdomen
the first item to comment is the shape... but unfortunately i lost my words! there was quite a long silence with me doing some stupid movement of my hand hoping that the word im searching for will immediately pop-up into mind.. haha.. even the doctor assessing started to pray "a'uzubillah himinash syaithonirajimm".. huhu.. but alhamdulillah not for long after, i managed to find a suitible word to describe.. fuhh~ *relieved!*

ninth spot :: auscultate the chest
hate this spot! there's too many mistakes i've done.. after reading the task, i went... BLURRRR!!!
i juz stood beside the bed looking at the patient's chest but not knowing wut to do.. and then suddenly i started to palpate for his apex?! for wut??? it's not the heart u shud examine, it's the chest! haha.. after quite some time, i realized im doing the wrong examination.. i immediately started auscultating his upper, middle, and lower lung zones trying to hear for the breath sound, any wheezes or crepitations.. after i felt satisfied with my findings i went to the doctor who's face was s00ooo horror oke.. not even a little smile present.. after commenting on the breath sound and the wheezes, he asked.. "wut about the vocal resonance?" AAaa~!! i forgot about that part of examination..!! *frust2* quickly running back to the patient, and do the xm.. then went back to the doctor and said.. "increase".. haha.. actually i dunno if the answer was correct or not.. bcoz i lost my focus and cannot interpret wut i heard exactly... hmm, at that state forgetting a step in an examination do add up my nervousness!=.="

tenth and last spot of the day :: taking history of jaundice
when i looked at the assessor... Dr zed?! i was like.. im dead meat! i remembered the time he assessed me during the long case last time.. it was horror!! asking to auscultate the aortic area.. so not knowing wut i heard.. but this time, alhamdulillah.. his question was quite simple and i managed to answer it.. but still im worried of my marks coz i caught my eyes looking at the marks of my friends previously assessed by him.. not even a single person got full marks.. even worse sumone got not even half of the full marks! oho doctor, pilzz be generous to me.. plizz, plizz..

and at last... fuhh.. i managed to call it a day! =)
now, im looking forward for surgery.. those who had juz finished their surgery exams said the exams was so sO SO hard! uhuk3 takutnye! but insyaAllah i'll try my best... 
chaiyok2 my dear friendss.. let us together fight to be the best future doctors graduating from alex.. aminn~

~salam maal hijrah~